Living in Magic
I’ve decided I don’t know what I’m doing. i don’t know what I’m creating or what I’m here to create. I don’t know who the Universe wants me to be. I just don’t know. Anytime I think I know something, while deluding myself that I’m thinking I don’t know, something shows up to show me that I really don’t know. For example, how did blood get on my red peppers in my apartment last time I was losing touch with reality in so-called “psychosis”. I don’t think this term paints an accurate picture of the reality of the extraordinary experience but I will do with it for the moment.
Wait, the term psychosis give momentum to the wrong energy. Ones inner energy of what one thinks psychosis is given inertia. That’s not what it is. Am I am out to prove that by way of this Magic Notebook or Magical Record. I am purposely posting this post in a delay of at least 5 months. Today is November 1st, 2015. I am putting it out there and asking the Universe to guide me toward the highest most joyful expression that is possible in this embodiment. It’s not about me as the ego. As the ego goes, what flows though this body-mind-organism is something that glows a different glow that perhaps isn’t recognizable to those around this energy, this me. They want me to be the me they know me to be. But how much longer can I be the me that is not me to please and appease those that cannot recognize their own inner light. Or is it that I doubt my own.
I’m not sure how the Universe works. Each time I try to grasp at something, it soon fades away, as all concepts inevitably do. I’ve lived in concepts. I love concepts. But love is not a concept. How do I live in love? Love is so powerful it removes the subjective values of good vs. bad. There is no such thing as the suchness has a much different quality. It is the quality of all qualities which makes them all equalities.
I’m asking the Universe to show me the way. In faith and trust, in lust for the just, the true, the beautiful and love. I negate my own interpretation and ask to see with pure perception from which action is one. With infinite gratitude.